Dear 2019,

Dear Morgan,
         This last year was more than you could have imagined being able to handle. Though you may have fallen, you found your strength to rise. Your struggles and the hardships you faced in these last 365 days were not your own to carry, but you did so anyway. To say this year was the toughest I know is almost insulting to the debilitating pain and outright anguish you've endured. But in spite of many vile attempts to bring you down or out entirely, you, my friend, are still here.  So, I'll call this year more of a success than you can see right now. We can dive more into that in the next post, but for now let's look solely toward the future, shall we? 
       May 2019 be all that you choose to make it, it's finally your time. Yeah, take a deep sigh of relief with me because this time I really believe it. May the melody in your soul return again so vibrantly that you cannot help but sing along. May it be filled with countless shameless dance parties and car rides. May the days of adventure & joy be in abundance. May the new beginnings bring consistent happiness that overshadow the sadness of this year's painful good-bye's. May you zealously fall in love with yourself all over again but deeper than ever before. May you get tangled up in your own self-love so much so that you get lost within in with no wish to become unraveled. May you both give and receive raw kindness. May you dance along with life, & may you stumble in that dance and find your footing to jump back in repeatedly. May you begin to look upward again so that you can find the beauty in the darkest of nights; Then may you find comfort in the evenings once more as you used to. May you love the moon as much as the sun and the sun as much as the moon. May your world begin to make sense again, and allow the color to bleed back in without holding back. But MRB, most importantly, may you find that electrifying magic you so boldly believe in.
         As you do all of this, remember that you're healing. Remember that you had to learn to dance long ago, so you may stumble more than you'd like to at first. Remember that not everyone has the same spirited passion you hold inside of you, but that it's not a bad thing. Remember that for the right people you will never be "too much" of anything. Remember that your worth can be defined by nobody but you. Remember that your love is special and not to hand it out to just anyone. Remember that you've found your voice and you know how to use it. Remember your gifts to this earth and to use them daily. Remember that you are not your enemy, you are your friend. Remember above all to protect & feed your soul. But above all else, trust it, it'll guide you every single time. Remember that zest for life and grab onto it.
       May you remember this year, but may you also forget. Forget about the things you cannot control. Forget about the moments that paralyze you. Forget once you've worked through it so that you can truly live. Forget the one's that do not matter, for they mean nothing. Forget to explain everything to everyone; you owe them nothing. Forget everything you've blamed yourself for that isn't yours to carry. Forget that weight both on your shoulders and in your heart; let it go. Forget about the shame, the embarrassment, and the self-blame. There's no room for the toxicity in 2019. It's undoubtedly going to be a rocky start, that's likely when you are surfacing through the rubble. But that's the thing, you're resurfacing. And my goodness what great timing it is. I cannot wait to see you to continue to claw you way out and rise & crawl again, get back up, to walk again. I'm excited to see you run, to take off, and inevitably: soar.

                                               Love, the 2018 Defeated Morgan that is Starting to Believe Again